Hey you! You right there! You, and You and You. Gather You, around and bring your friends to hear or see or read some
words by Him that Knows.
I am the Herald Pytor and would bid you stay and learn of Life within the Glarkian Prophecies as seen by the Most High,
Your King and mine, His Royal Highness King Magnus5 Baghautur the Braut.
Take it away Your Kinglyness!
Thank you Lord Pytor. Men and Women of strong typing skills are needed now, more than ever, to capture the eye, pique the curiosity, and draw the wandering mind towards the Situation As We Know It To Be.
Nobles, Gentles, and Scummy (yet truly beloved by Us) Serfs,
It has come to Our attention that We have entered into the Glark Ages. Slowly, slowly, gradually picking up steam, faster and faster, until at a second before Crescendo, Eris Herself, Goddess be praised, flattered and groveled to (if that is your choice) or perhaps Goddess be glared at (I mean, really. Was all this necessary?), looked upon the Chaos and stamped it with Her Special Handle With Care, This Side Up Stamp of Ages and lo, Strangeness sweeps in with grasping claws to take down the Edifice of Honor, that Kingdom that We hold in such High Esteem, That which warms Our Heart and truly, Our Most Royal Backside (that’s the polite way of saying ass.)
Geez, We just started this sorta recently, and We were hoping to get some movement and momentum going on in this Realm. We could see in Our mind’s eye and feel within Our body’s pineal, the Awesome Coolness of This Creation of Which We Accept Full Responsibility For.
But the Doomsayers of the Glarkian Prophecies have spoken. They are agents of Strange Change. They are the Cashiers of Chaos, collecting Eris’s due. And lo, and behold, these THINGS that were threatened or shown or warned about are happening as We type!
Many THINGS and PEOPLE HAVE BEEN LOST, ARE MISSING, OR NO LONGER EXIST! This is happening before, during and probably after Our typing.
From outwards – in, We shall tell thee of Some of What Was Lost.
We have lost Our Wildlands. We have lost Our forts and Strongholds within the borderlands. We have lost much of Our Land within the
Kingdom Proper, as well as some real estate in Our Kingdom improper, such as the Six Provinces. We may have lost our mind.
More than the loss of those THINGS, We have lost PEOPLE, real people, fake people, imaginary people and legendary people. We have lost Our Expeditionary Forces into the Wild. We have lost Dukes, Earls, Counts, Barons, and Knights. We have lost councilors, advisors, officials, trash collectors and yea, verily the Chao Keepers. We have lost much My Dregs. And All This Before Others
Even Remembered Who They Were, thereby being eligible for being lost. They in essence have lost their chance to remember and become lost again. So they lost.
If Each THING or PERSON is a Nickel of Eris’s Strange Change, then by Goddess, We’ve lost at least a couple of Bucks! We can only state once again, Save Your Change! A Nickel Saved is five cents! If We can Save Enough Cents, some of what We speak of will make more sense.
We are Saved! We are Saved! Lost Change of Eris, Lost and Now Found!
Remember kids, mums and dads, and others, eat your peas, respond to the Want Ads, volunteer and keep truckin’ on. For Upon this Firmament, the Replicating Fragment of Tar Shakan Strives to Thrive! Already born and borne, it’s frail heartbeat throbs to the footsteps of YOU ALL! Let’s March This Puppy Back To Health and then, of course, towards retirement, at some point, not now naturally. For to fail in this task will March This Wasp Straight to Hell!
We hope We have made Ourselves Clear on This Subject! We now stop typing so that Lord Pyte can take over and We can go get Us some Peas!
Peas, Peas, Peas, Peas. Peas, the Magical Fruit.
The more you eat, the more you….Become full.
Darn Tootin’.
Well, thank you, your Majesty. That was……interesting? No, not really. Informative? No, I have no idea what you were typing
about. Long and Wordy and Disjointed? Yes, that’s the best way to describe it. It was long and wordy and disjointed. All of
which is what we have come to expect from you. It’s the least that you can do. Thanks again Sire.
Well, there you all have it, once again. So keep in mind….what His Royal Highness typed. And you should….well, do something…I think….
Until we “talk”again, I shall remain silent, but vigilant. Signing off my broadcast day.
KPYTR LOGOFF. PRESS ANY KEY TO CONTINUE.
words by Him that Knows.
I am the Herald Pytor and would bid you stay and learn of Life within the Glarkian Prophecies as seen by the Most High,
Your King and mine, His Royal Highness King Magnus5 Baghautur the Braut.
Take it away Your Kinglyness!
Thank you Lord Pytor. Men and Women of strong typing skills are needed now, more than ever, to capture the eye, pique the curiosity, and draw the wandering mind towards the Situation As We Know It To Be.
Nobles, Gentles, and Scummy (yet truly beloved by Us) Serfs,
It has come to Our attention that We have entered into the Glark Ages. Slowly, slowly, gradually picking up steam, faster and faster, until at a second before Crescendo, Eris Herself, Goddess be praised, flattered and groveled to (if that is your choice) or perhaps Goddess be glared at (I mean, really. Was all this necessary?), looked upon the Chaos and stamped it with Her Special Handle With Care, This Side Up Stamp of Ages and lo, Strangeness sweeps in with grasping claws to take down the Edifice of Honor, that Kingdom that We hold in such High Esteem, That which warms Our Heart and truly, Our Most Royal Backside (that’s the polite way of saying ass.)
Geez, We just started this sorta recently, and We were hoping to get some movement and momentum going on in this Realm. We could see in Our mind’s eye and feel within Our body’s pineal, the Awesome Coolness of This Creation of Which We Accept Full Responsibility For.
But the Doomsayers of the Glarkian Prophecies have spoken. They are agents of Strange Change. They are the Cashiers of Chaos, collecting Eris’s due. And lo, and behold, these THINGS that were threatened or shown or warned about are happening as We type!
Many THINGS and PEOPLE HAVE BEEN LOST, ARE MISSING, OR NO LONGER EXIST! This is happening before, during and probably after Our typing.
From outwards – in, We shall tell thee of Some of What Was Lost.
We have lost Our Wildlands. We have lost Our forts and Strongholds within the borderlands. We have lost much of Our Land within the
Kingdom Proper, as well as some real estate in Our Kingdom improper, such as the Six Provinces. We may have lost our mind.
More than the loss of those THINGS, We have lost PEOPLE, real people, fake people, imaginary people and legendary people. We have lost Our Expeditionary Forces into the Wild. We have lost Dukes, Earls, Counts, Barons, and Knights. We have lost councilors, advisors, officials, trash collectors and yea, verily the Chao Keepers. We have lost much My Dregs. And All This Before Others
Even Remembered Who They Were, thereby being eligible for being lost. They in essence have lost their chance to remember and become lost again. So they lost.
If Each THING or PERSON is a Nickel of Eris’s Strange Change, then by Goddess, We’ve lost at least a couple of Bucks! We can only state once again, Save Your Change! A Nickel Saved is five cents! If We can Save Enough Cents, some of what We speak of will make more sense.
We are Saved! We are Saved! Lost Change of Eris, Lost and Now Found!
Remember kids, mums and dads, and others, eat your peas, respond to the Want Ads, volunteer and keep truckin’ on. For Upon this Firmament, the Replicating Fragment of Tar Shakan Strives to Thrive! Already born and borne, it’s frail heartbeat throbs to the footsteps of YOU ALL! Let’s March This Puppy Back To Health and then, of course, towards retirement, at some point, not now naturally. For to fail in this task will March This Wasp Straight to Hell!
We hope We have made Ourselves Clear on This Subject! We now stop typing so that Lord Pyte can take over and We can go get Us some Peas!
Peas, Peas, Peas, Peas. Peas, the Magical Fruit.
The more you eat, the more you….Become full.
Darn Tootin’.
Well, thank you, your Majesty. That was……interesting? No, not really. Informative? No, I have no idea what you were typing
about. Long and Wordy and Disjointed? Yes, that’s the best way to describe it. It was long and wordy and disjointed. All of
which is what we have come to expect from you. It’s the least that you can do. Thanks again Sire.
Well, there you all have it, once again. So keep in mind….what His Royal Highness typed. And you should….well, do something…I think….
Until we “talk”again, I shall remain silent, but vigilant. Signing off my broadcast day.
KPYTR LOGOFF. PRESS ANY KEY TO CONTINUE.